Other People's Opinions

A couple of weeks ago, I wrote about managing our inner critic but what about criticism from others?

A recurrent topic I coach with clients is the worry and fear they feel about other people’s opinions.

Many of my clients are too afraid to take action in their business or make decisions at work because they are concerned about what other people may say.

I can remember a time before I decided to leave the legal profession when I was worried about what my peers and colleagues would think about me becoming a life coach. I had a friend innocently ask me if that was a real thing. Consequently, I slowed down my decisions and business growth. I didn’t tell people I was studying to become a life coach or how I could help them for fear of adverse judgment.

Through coaching, I came to realise that people judge one another all the time. Sometimes it's negative and sometimes it's positive, and that can be okay. It only becomes a problem when I give it too much time and attention, when I start believing it as though it were true without question, and when I forget that I have the power to disregard it as I choose.

I love Taylor Swift’s song – Shake It Off. I love the imagery that appears in my mind when I imagine shaking off other people’s opinions. My friends and I, as we age, find it easier to care less about what others think (much to the disgust of my children on some occasions). It can feel so liberating to no longer be shackled by the fear and worry that comes with focusing on other people's opinions. I get to be more and more me – more real.

Imagine planning your day with intention. How can you ditch the time you’re spending worrying about what others will say about you? How could your business grow bigger and faster if you let it go?

Here are some question swap-outs you might like to try out when you notice you are focusing on other people’s opinions about you:

What will they think about me? v. What do I want to believe about myself?
What if they’re right? v. How could they be wrong?
What if they judge me? v. How am I judging myself?
How can I avoid their criticism? v. How can I support myself when it happens?

If you want to learn more about how to stop worrying so much about other people's opinions, book your free Time Design session with me by clicking on the clock!