Why do we obsess over what we haven't done?

Earlier this week, I was sick and missed both my gym and Pilates classes. At the end of the week when I was reflecting on my achievements I noticed how I kept fixating on the classes I hadn’t attended and downplayed the ones I did.

The conversation in my mind was annoying and undermined the commitment I had shown in resuming classes once I recovered.

Why do we do this? Why do we focus on what we haven’t done in our business and ignore all the tasks we have completed?

There’s a wonderful book The Gap and the Gain written by Dan Sullivan and Dr. Ben Hardy that addresses this exact question.

In the book, they explain that we often measure ourselves against an ideal or goal we haven’t yet achieved—the Gap.

This focus on what we haven’t done or where we fall short creates feelings of inadequacy and frustration making it harder for us to keep showing up in our business.

On the other hand, the Gain is about measuring ourselves against our past selves and recognising the progress we’ve made. This mindset shift helps us appreciate our achievements and feel motivated making it easier to keep going.
Think about it like this: When I was upset about missing my classes, I was in the Gap. I ignored the fact that I had rested, recovered, and got back to my routine—a clear Gain.

In business, it’s easy to get trapped in the Gap, constantly chasing the next milestone without acknowledging the steps we’ve already taken.

By focusing on the Gain rather than the Gap, we can build a more positive, productive mindset that drives us forward. Remember, every step counts, and progress is progress, no matter the size.